The Things No One Knows About
by darkprincess1791
Summary: The things that happen behind closed doors and away from prying eyes the real sam and dean story. Somewhat AU rated T for some sugesstive themes.


**So this is only my second fan fic but i am also writing this with a good friend of mine mrs. Persephonequeenofinnocences. she is amazing even if this is her first published piece. well i hope you enjoy.**

A shape shifter a stupid shape shifter dean hates shape shifters and right now that is all he is thinking as he drives towards the next case. He glances over at Sam asleep on the seat and smiles because god Sam is cute when he sleeps. Dean doesn't remember exactly when they became more then brothers but he does know exactly when he knew he loved Sam more then he should. Dean was eighteen Sam was fourteen and that year Sam was having nightmares horrible nightmares. Sometimes Sam woke screaming because of them. Then dean being the awesome older brother that he was would let Sam crawl into bed with him so that Sam could go back to sleep, well the night dean knew he was in love started out that way. Nightmare, Sam crawling into bed, but Sam didn't fall asleep like he always did instead he stared at dean with these eyes, eyes that just screamed don't leave me. Then Sam fourteen and barely knowing anything beyond the way they grew up and asked dean a question that blew him away. He said "De, why us?" at the time dean couldn't answer Sam didn't even know what to say, so instead he did the only thing he could think he kissed Sam on the forehead and told him to go to sleep.

Sam apparently didn't want to sleep he wanted to talk which kind of annoyed the hell out of dean because why can't Sam just sleep, the whole town knew he needed it at this point. But no Sam wanted to talk, and about school of all things. So dean talked and talked and talked some more before he knew it though Sam was falling asleep and dean himself was about to when the screaming started again. So he woke Sam up and held him close telling him everything would be fine and that nothing could hurt him as long as he was there. Sam fell asleep like that curled up on dean's lap his head in dean's chest. Dean didn't dare move because he didn't want to wake Sam. So dean sat there and thought, he thought about how it was fucked up that they lost their mom and that Sam was having nightmares about it. He thought about how he would rather Sam never had to grow up this way. He thought about Sam and how he would do anything for him.

The more he thought about Sam the less he thought I wonder if he'll ever learn to throw a baseball and the more he thought Sam is cute when he sleeps. Then dean found himself wondering if Sam had kissed anyone and how Sam's lips tasted and dean knew something was up then, so he laid Sam down gently got up from bed and paced around a bit trying to figured out his thoughts. He knew they were bad and that he shouldn't think them but he couldn't bring himself to care. He was starting to wear a path in the carpet when a small voice said "De what's wrong?" Dean just smiled and crawled back into bed behind Sam and said "nothing Sammy go back to sleep." And Sam rolled over and did just that even though dean was awake now more than ever.

Dean couldn't stop the thoughts and let's be honest he didn't want to; he did however want to kiss Sam. So he made up his mind and decided that since Sam was asleep and wouldn't know it would be ok. So dean as lightly as he could he kissed Sam's lips and immediately afterwards dean thought that nothing compared to the taste of Sam's lips. Content and happy dean lied down and fell asleep. That moment that kiss was all it took for dean to know he was in love.

Dean glances over at Sam again having heard him groan a bit. Dean always does this when he drives at night he'll get lost in his thoughts but one sound or word from Sam and he was right back to the current moment. Sam moved again and dean knew he was about to wake up and glare at dean for not stopping like he said he would do over an hour ago, but dean couldn't help it he wanted to get this case over with as soon as possible.

"De where are we?" Dean smiled because it took a lot of blow jobs and a lot of convincing on dean's part to get Sam to call him De again. You could almost say he got off on it. "Nebraska. Heading towards Tennessee." He glances over at Sam and smirks. Sam just shakes his head and says *Why didn't you stop like you said you were going to?" Dean sighs he knew this was coming, "Because I want to get this dam case over with I hate shape shifters Sam I really do." Sam nods but he doesn't say anything else and it kind of upsets dean so he says "The next place I see we'll stop ok Sammy baby?" Sam nods and says "Ok De." All dean can think is that the little shit just did that on purpose.

Sam smiles a little and watches dean drive. He does this sometimes sits back and watches dean drive because dean always looks at peace when he is behind the wheel of his baby and they don't get peace very often in their line of work. When dean finally pulls off the road and pulls into a little motel Sam is wide awake and wondering how the hell he is going to get back to sleep. Dean goes in and gets the room and meets Sam at the car grabbing a couple bags and walking to the room. Dean opens the door and they go in and even though the room shouldn't surprise them it does because wow people never run out of crappy themes do they.

Dean looks around the Broadway themed room and shakes his head. "I'm striping the comforter off the bed because there is no way I am sleeping under west side story and it creeps me out that I even know what that is." Dean grumbles while Sam just shakes his head and laughs. Dean glares at Sam then announces that he is going to take a shower and heads to the bathroom. Sam stands there thinking for a minute because this would be the perfect time to have some couple time with dean. After all it has been awhile and Sam is going nuts being around dean and not touching him. It didn't help that Sam didn't have much time left with dean, true dean did it because he didn't want to be alone and because he felt Sam deserved to live but now Sam was going to have to live without dean.

Sam stood there thinking for a few minutes and then made a decision and walked into the bathroom and quietly stripped off his clothes. He then quietly slipped in behind dean and wrapped his arms around dean's waist and as soon as he did dean relaxed into Sam. "Sam, what are you doing?" dean questions. "Loving my boyfriend" Sam answers honestly. Dean stands there a second and then turns around in Sam's arms and kisses him deeply. Sam kissed him back and wondered if this was actually going to happen because since Sam got back dean had been a little reserved about touching him.

"Sam kisses dean deepening it hoping that dean will actually let this happen this time. Sam pushed dean back up against the bathroom shower wall grinding against him. Sam can feel it as dean tries to push Sam away. Sam sighs and looks at dean cupping his cheek. "Dean please touch me kiss me anything. I am still trying to get you out of this deal and I don't have much time. So please just kiss me something I can remember if god forbid I can't save you." Sam had started to cry as he said all of it. He was still freaking about how in less than a week he is more than likely going to lose dean.

Dean sighed and looked at Sam. "Sammy I just... I know this is already going to be hard on you. With me being gone and you here alone... I just I don't want you feeling like you have to fuck me because this may be our last chance. "He kisses Sam gently wipeing away his tears." I don't want you to look back to this and think all I got before he died was some cheap sex... I would rather you be pissed at me so when you get me back you kick my ass for not fucking you when I could." Dean is determined that Sam will be able to save him or at least bring him back.

"What if I can't bring you back though dean?" Sam asks seriously wanting to know. Dean looks Sam straight in the eyes and says "You will find a way I know you will your good like that." Dean has considered that Sam won't be able to bring him back but he wants Sam to have hope because after all in their line of work anything can happen. Sam comes back with, "Dean I've been trying to get you out of your deal all year and nothing. Ruby can't even get you out of it." Dean growls when he hears that bitch's name but instead of spouting off with some remark about her he says, "Maybe you should be looking for a way to get me out of hell then."

Sam looks at dean and sighs. "Dean you know as good as I do. The only way I know to get someone out of hell is to make a deal with a cross road demon." he glares at Dean when he says that, Dean looks at Sam and pulls him close. "I know you Sammy. You know so much more about this job then I do and I am sure you will find what you need to bring me back from hell. "Dean kisses Sam's cheek trying to get him to stop being grumpy. Even though he knows what will pull the stick out of Sam's ass but he isn't going to give him that. Sam sighs and grabs a towel from the rack wrapping it around him. "I am going to go watch TV. You finish your shower baby..." Sam climbs out of the shower and goes and lies on the bed.

**hope you liked it please rate and review and hopefully we will have chapter two up soon. :)**


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